Making That First Appointment!
Whether it is individual, marriage or family therapy that first call can be the hardest to make. Believe me. It took nearly 6 months of worry and obsessing until I made my first call to set up an initial therapy appointment. I had many reason for delaying. Some reasons were understandable. Some reasons were simply a way of avoiding the unknown. Looking back all reasons were understandable and all had an element of avoidance.
Some of those reasons include:
- I should be able to figure this out for myself and deal with my own problems.
- It costs so much.
- What if the therapist finds out I’m as broken, weak, confused as I fear?
- The therapist might laugh at me and I’d feel so ashamed.
- The therapist may tell me I’m hopeless and can’t be helped.
- It is so hard to imagine saying out loud how much I am hurting.
- It is hard to imagine saying out loud how sad I feel.
- It is hard to imagine saying out loud how empty I am inside.
- It is hard to imagine saying out loud how much I fear or worry.
- My thoughts and feelings frighten and confuse me enough.
- What if saying them out loud makes me feel worse?
- Who want to hear about my worries and fears?
- If I was just man or woman enough I could deal with this myself.
- Maybe I’m just making a mountain out of a molehill.
Perhaps you have these or similar thoughts about the therapy process. These are some of the thoughts that ran through my mind as I considered making that first therapy appointment call. I learned that they are all normal responses for those who have never embarked on the journey of self-discovery healing and rebirth of faith, hope and love that is the therapy process.
It took me about 6 months from the time until I made that first call. 6 months and I was required to be in therapy as part of my training to be a psychotherapist! I had the cover to tell others (and myself) that I’m not really in therapy for my own personal emotional pain, sadness, confusion or relationship issues but because I “have” to for my training. So I know from experience that making that first call fro therapy is difficult and filled with worry, anxiety, and fear.
I congratulate you for considering making that call. When you call me you will find someone who has been on the other side of therapy room himself. You will find someone who use all of his skills, experience and own self-understanding to help you tell your story; to find your path again, to fall in love again; to experience life in all its abundance. So make that call even though you are afraid and worried.